We’ve grown up together. She’s 28 and I’m a guy of 27. She’s getting married next spring and she’s asked my opinion on all her plans. We’ve always been very close.
We went out a couple of months ago to our favourite bar. We had a bottle of wine and then a second and we walked back to my place. My girlfriend wasn’t there as she was working nights.
My friend told me she was feeling under pressure to have a church wedding but she didn’t want one as there was nobody to give her away.
Her dad died three years ago.
I said I’d do it and she was so thrilled. She went to kiss me but our lips met and it went into a full-blown snog. It came out of nowhere. We didn’t stop, probably because of the alcohol, and we started taking each other’s clothes off and had sex in my front room.
I couldn’t stop thinking about her. A week later she said she’d come to see me to talk about it and we decided to give each other some space. We were about to hug as usual, but then it led to a kiss again and we were in my bed once more having passionate sex.
She can’t take the Pill and we tried to be safe – but we may not have been safe enough. She didn’t call me for a few weeks and then she texted saying she was pregnant. She told me she’d had sex with her fiancé the same week so she’s convinced it’s his.
Our main relationships have been going from strength to strength and we regret what happened. But on my down days I convince myself the baby is mine. She’s had her 12-week scan and the possible dates of conception span that week.
I’m out of my mind with worry. We’ve said we’ll do a DNA test when the baby is born.
It’s already causing problems for me. I’m not sleeping and I’m snappy with my girlfriend.
Some parents give teen daughters breast implants as a present.
Is this madness? My e-leaflet on the pros and cons will help you decide.
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DEIDRE SAYS: I’m afraid I can’t take that worry away. You’re not going to know for sure until that DNA test is done.
It’s hard for doctors and midwives accurately to predict conception dates, especially as sperm can remain live up to seven days after sex.
Your friend has got to do some clear thinking. Her wedding is approaching but she must be wondering whether her marriage will stand the test of time if her fiancé isn’t the dad.
It sounds as if she’s having this baby whatever. You can’t change that, but my e-leaflet on Unplanned Pregnancy will help her decide whether she’s better at least postponing the wedding.
If the baby is yours, you’ll have to help out financially and preferably emotionally too – and hope your girlfriend can forgive you.
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