If I'd not given my daughter up for abortion would she still be alive?

DEAR DEIDRE: I AM devastated to learn that my daughter, who I put up for adoption, died aged 25.

At 18 I found out I was pregnant. But my family had no money to support me and the father didn’t want to know.

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By the time I knew I was expecting, it was too late to terminate, so I had to give her up.

It wasn’t easy and I thought about her every day. When I was furloughed during the first lockdown I decided to look for my daughter.

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I went through an agency to trace her but was completely blindsided to learn she had died in a car accident.

If I hadn’t given her up, she may have still been alive.

DEIDRE SAYS: It would have been devastating to learn your daughter has died.

I am so sorry but please don’t blame yourself. Nobody could ever have foreseen what might have happened.

She was brought up by loving parents, who must be heartbroken too, and you did your best to ensure she would have all she needed to thrive.

You can find support through The Compassionate Friends, who help bereaved parents, no matter what the circumstances. Contact them at tcf.org.uk, 0345 123 2304.

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