I used to have amazing sex with my wife but she no longer wants it

DEAR DEIDRE: I USED to have the best sex life with my wife, with both quantity and quality.

But in the past couple of years it has nosedived.

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Instead of four or five times a week, I am lucky if we have sex once a month. I’m 53 and my wife is 49.

Intercourse hurts her now and I can’t put her through the pain.

She tries other ways to satisfy me but it’s not the same. I’m bored.

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DEIDRE SAYS:

She is most likely menopausal or perimenopausal, which is when hormonal changes can affect a woman’s libido and inhibit her natural lubrication.

Without this, sex can become very painful for a woman.

Talk to your wife and suggest she sees her GP.

She might be able to take HRT – that is hormone replacement therapy – which could help.

When you are having sex, take things slowly and focus on good foreplay to ensure she is comfortable.

A lot of couples do regain a fulfilling sex life after the menopause and I am sure you can too.