KIDS say the funniest things – at least when they aren't YOUR kids!
A hilarious thread on Mumsnet saw mortified mothers share the most embarrassing things their children have ever said, with other parents left in hysterics by some of the revelations.
"My daughter told her (very handsome male) teacher all about my hairy F**ny and how I have to sometimes pluck hairs out of my t*t," one mum wrote.
"Oh, and how funny it was that mummy grew an actual beard while pregnant with my son… Thanks babe."
While parents responded with laughing emojis and lots of "LOLs", another embarrassed mum had a similar situation, as she wrote: "I was in a loo in busy public toilets and my 3 year old yelled, 'MUMMY, WHY IS YOUR MINKIE SO FLUFFY?'
"I swear it could be heard in space!"
Another remembered a separate toilet encounter, as she wrote: "Remember my son who was 3 at the time saying top of his voice in shopping centre toilets 'we're different aren't we mummy? Because I have a willy and you have a little hole. maybe you will grow a willy when you're older'."
One mum wrote: "Somebody (don't recall who) asked my DS (dear son) 'What does your mum do?" – obviously meaning a job – he replied 'My mummy drinks whiskey'."
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Another mother wrote: "When my youngest son was about 3. He suddenly pooed his pants in a shop, before we could grab him and take him to an appropriate place to deal with the poop, he grabbed the turd right out of his pants and preceded to throw it down the aisle.
"Mortified is an understatement!!!!"
Recalling embarrassing things that have happened at school, someone else wrote: "Console yourself with the thought that school has never phoned you using the words 'could you bring a pair of pants for your child please.
"She was sitting cross-legged in assembly and we noticed she doesn't appear to be wearing any'.
"I swear reception aged children are just hard-wired to embarrass us."
Speaking of embarrassing, this mum "wanted to die there and then" when her four-year-old daughter "let out the longest, loudest fart that had ever existed" while waiting in a packed but silent doctor's surgery.
"To make the matter worse – this child then RAISED HER HAND, and in a loud and proud voice stated – 'Don't worry everyone, that was just my bum'," she wrote.
Another mum revealed how her 16-month-old "pointed at a very large woman wearing pink, said ‘Peppa!’ And started oinking".
And in another weight-related embarrassing encounter, one mum commented that her child "went around a Slimming World group going . 'You're fat', 'You're not fat', 'You're VERY VERY fat'."
In other parenting news, this mum transformed her child's bedrooms by using bargains off of Facebook – saving herself £100s.
Another mum was left red-faced after she couldn't get her 'elf's' writing off her door.
And this woman took to Reddit to complain about her colleague giving her twin sons the "most idiotic" names.
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